Houston’s Furriest Mascots
THERE’S NO SUCH THING AS AN OFFSEASON FOR MASCOTS. And we quickly learned there is no such thing as a normal day in the life of Houston’s favorite and furriest mascots. It’s been eight years since we last sat down with Clutch, Orbit , Toro and Diesel, so we decided to meet them at the gym for a quick sweat sesh…
HOW FAST CAN YOU RUN A MILE?
Toro: Fast enough.
Diesel: How fast can you make a spicy maple tea bread, provolone, brie, basil pesto sandwich?
Orbit: I don’t like running.
HOW MUCH CAN YOU BENCH?
Clutch: Only 185.
Toro: How much does a defensive tackle weigh?
Diesel: Orbit after he eats a lunar ton.
Orbit: A lunar ton – it’s funny because it’s space.
HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN WITH THE TEAM?
Clutch: 20 years.
Toro: 14 years.
Diesel: 7 years and 10 months.
Orbit: I was around from 1990–1999, but took a 13-year sabbatical back in space. I’m back for good, and entering my third year back.
WHAT DO YOU EAT WHEN YOU’RE CARB-LOADING?
Clutch: Delicious steak. Sorry, Toro!
Toro: BBQ chicken and stadium food. Definitely not beef!
Diesel: Spicy maple tea bread, with brie cheese, a slice of provolone topped with two pounds of basil pesto…and steak.
Orbit: I’d crush some hotdogs. And moon pies.
WHAT DO YOU DO TO STAY IN SHAPE?
Clutch: Run and box.
Toro: Swing and rappel from the top rope of NRG Stadium.
Diesel: Stay away from steamrollers.
Orbit: Round IS a shape.
WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE WORKOUT BUDDY ON YOUR TEAM?
Clutch: D-Mo – that guy is a beast. And I mean a real beast like me!
Toro: JJ Watt – since JJ and I have somewhat the same physique, we work out together.
Diesel: Brad Davis, because he is the only one left on the team that hasn’t asked me what I say.
Orbit: Altuve – we just give each other piggyback rides to train.
FAVORITE PLACE TO RUN IN HOUSTON?
Clutch: Memorial Park.
Toro: With our fans at the Running of the Bulls event.
Diesel: 29.751332 latitude, -95.352623 longitude.
Orbit: The stairs at Minute Maid Park.
This article originally ran in the print issue of Local Houston Magazine’s March 2015 issue – their first ever sports issue. For the online version, click here.