Country Strong Contenders

Photoshop amazingness courtesy of @rememberthe1

Living in Texas, or I suppose anywhere in the South, country music just comes with the territory, if not the whole being of one’s soul. Odds are you exited your mother’s womb with either Garth Brooks or George Strait playing in the hospital room and an obnoxiously bedazzled belt buckle  wrapped around your tiny little umbilical cord and it’s been honky-tonk sailing ever since, yes?

With my intensely opinionated sport’s column, The Blonde Side, part of what I take great pride in is finding hilarious and sometimes witty parallels of athletes to some variation of useless pop culture – this time country music shall be my muse.

It wasn’t long ago I compared NFL QBs to the cast of Jersey Shore, so why not take two staples in my everyday life and see what we come up with.

Below is my list of country music song titles and a pretty damn good comparison to an athlete or well-known sport’s story. I’m sure there are better options, so leave a comment if I missed a glaringly obvious parallel.

Ty Herndon – “I Can’t Do It All” – I think Giselle was heard singing this to Tom when he came out of the locker room.

James Otto – “Just Got Started Lovin’ You” – Chris Paul briefly started signing this to the Lakers before he changed his tune to Travis Tritt’s “It’s A Great Day To Be Alive” after signing that 4-year/$68mil deal with that other Los Angeles team.

George Strait – “I Saw God Today” – Tim Tebow. ‘Nuff said.

Joe Nichols – “The Shape I’m In” – Perhaps the tag team duo of Cecil and Prince Fielder?

Miranda Lambert – “Gunpowder & Lead” – *sigh* Must we talk about Plaxico Burress again?

Blake Shelton – “She Wouldn’t Be Gone” – “… if I had kept it in my pants.” Take your pick: Tiger or Kobe?

Rascal Flatts – “God Bless The Broken Road” – Remember the craziness of Michael Jordan getting cut from his high school basketball team? Look at him now with shoes people kill for. Literally.

Darius Rucker – “Comeback Song” – Drew Brees stating his case for MVP in second half of the season. Although it was enough for Hootie, it wasn’t quite enough for Drew.

Miranda Lambert – “White Liar” – The entire coaching staff at Penn State (ouch, too soon?)

Eli Young Band – “Crazy Girl” – Chris Chambers from the Chargers who actually married his stalker. Chambers in 2009: “Judge, that girl is CRAZY!” Chris Chambers in 2010: “Judge, that girl is my WIFE!” Who’s crazy now I ask you?

Sunny Sweeney – “Staying’s Worse Than Leaving” – Might be Steven Jackson’s anthem when his contract is up in 2014. To date: eight seasons, three Pro Bowls, 9,000 yards, Z-E-R-O playoff games. You decide.

Rascal Flatts featuring Natasha Beddingfield – “It’s Easy” – Floyd Mayweather, Jr. in the ring. Out of the ring? (Insert any other bad country song here)

Jason Aldean – “Tattoos On This Town” – None other than the Birdman, Chris Anderson.

Scotty McCreery – “The Trouble With Girls” – Chris Bosh. Poor guy.

Faith Hill – “Come Home” – All of Cleveland singing to LeBron during the draft and again right before The Decision. Cleveland fans quickly changed their tune.

Jake Owen – “Alone With You” – The song you don’t want to hear if you’re in a hotel room with Kobe

Billy Currington – “Pretty Good At Drinking Beer” – As Gronk so clearly displayed for us drowning his sorrows on the dance floor after the Super Bowl loss

Martina McBride – “I’m Going To Love You Through It” – Kobe’s wife after the hotel scandal (oops, can you tell I started this list before the $75mil deal went through?)

Alan Jackson – “Long Way To Go” – The theme song for the Dallas Cowboys the last 15 years

Craig Morgan – “This Ole Boy” – Simply change “ole” to “old” and “boy” to “boys” and you’ve got the Boston Celtics

Steve Holy – “Love Don’t Run” – And neither does Yao Ming.

Lady Antebellum – “Love Don’t Live Here Anymore” – Terrell Owens on every team he leaves. Soon he’ll be hearing this from the Indoor Football League from the team he actually owns!

George Strait – “Give It Away” – Kyle Williams in his recent playoff loss to the NY Giants

Chris Young – “Voices” – Mike Tyson and his crazy antics.

Billy Currington – “Like My Dog” – The obvious choice, Mike Vick.

Rascal Flatts – “I Won’t Let Go” – Brett Favre, you were cool and set a lot of records, but move along with retirement once and for all please.

Randy Rogers Band – “Lost and Found” – Wilson Ramos.

Carrie Underwood – “Change My Last Name” – A tie between Ocho Cinco (formerly Chad Johnson) and Metta World Peace (formerly Ron Artest).

Darius Rucker – “If I Had Wings” – My sweet little Muggsy Bogues coming in at 5ft 3in. Even without said wings, he was a doozie of a point guard.

Brooks and Dunn – “That Ain’t No Way To Go” – The country duo chastises LeBron and The Decision.

Tim McGraw – “Better Than I Used To Be” – Even at sixty, Shaq shoots better free throws now than he did as a member of the Orlando Magic.

Taylor Swift – “Fifteen” – Although she was 17, not 15, you gotta give this one to Giants superstar and hall of famer, Lawrence Taylor.

Big thanks to @rememberthe1 for the awesome graphic you see above. You can also follow The Blonde Side on Twitter @jaymelamm.

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Double G Sports Interview

Interview on Double G Sports for Women’s History Month with their “Women in Sports” feature. The Blonde Side was recently interviewed by Courtney Aurillo of Double G Sports  as part of their month long project to feature women in sports – both big and small. The Blonde Side was in great company with the likes of some other great names like Jennie Finch, Chloe Sutton, Jessica Mendoza, Chantal Sutherland, Jen Royale, Jessica Quioli and many others.

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Women’s Adventure Magazine Feature

The Blonde Side was recently listed as a "Featured Contributor" in the Spring 2012 issue of Women's Adventure Magazine. Check out the fun little bio and photo (photo by Vanderford Photography).

Since you may not be able to read said bio, here it is in all its glory: “A star athlete since the age of 5 struggling to pop a wheelie to impress a boy, Jayme has always had a knack for adventure and sports. Playing them, watching them, bossing other people around on how to play them – the whole nine. After working in professional sports in PR and marketing for 5 long years, Jayme was finally escorted out of the industry for what some would call non – PC behavior. Originally from Virginia, she is currently based out of Houston and spends her days (and nights) as a freelance writer in travel and sports, mostly in a full-court press writing her wildly opinionated sport’s column, TheBlondeSide.com.”

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Norfolk Admirals & The AHL

Admirals Puck Drop with Joe Gregory (back left) and myself (back right). (Photo: John Wright)

Admirals Puck Drop with Joe Gregory (back left) and myself (back right). (Photo: John Wright)

What’s It Take For The Admirals To Get Some Press?

Having been based in Houston the past five years and writing my sports column, The Blonde Side, I admit I’ve gotten a bit spoiled when it comes to sporting events.

Perhaps even a bit overzealous, like Heidi Montag and her unprecedented love for plastic surgery. In one city (albeit a large one), we have MLB, NFL, NBA, MLS, AHL, we are hosting next year’s NBA All-Star game, we just hosted the Olympic Marathon Time Trials and the list goes on and on. That’s a whole lotta sports, yes? It appears in the midst of my Houston zip code and all its national sports splendor, the Norfolk Admirals have fallen off my hometown radar, but it seems I wasn’t the only sports writer who forgot about the Admirals.

A few weeks ago when I was back visiting my hometown of Chesapeake, I noticed that the sport’s section of Friday’s overflowing Virginian-Pilot failed to make any mention of the Admirals and their home game set to take place later that evening. In a town where there is only one professional team currently in season, the question arises, if you’re not covering that team, what exactly is filling the pages of your illustrious sport’s section?

That was just enough prompting for me to make a call and head to Norfolk Scope to shadow Admirals Vice President and General Manager, Joe Gregory during their game against the Adirondack Phantoms (which they won) just weeks after their sellout crowd of 8,699.

Gregory. (Pic | Rob Twine)

I showed up at the Admirals Administrative Offices at 5pm with Starbucks in hand. Joe and his Director of Media Relations, Keith Phillips, had warned me it’d be a long night with a lot of walking. Their advice to wear comfortable shoes reminded me of one of those overplayed Haynes commercials, but thankfully, I obliged. I sat down for a brief background on Mr. Gregory, who is not only the VP of the Admirals, but as of last October, also the GM of the Norfolk Tides. Needless to say, the Youngstown native is busy. As one of the youngest GMs in history (if not the youngest), Gregory first became a GM at the ripe age of 26 for the Youngstown SteelHounds, but his first gig in sports was much earlier with the LPGA at 15.

But back to his current role with the Admirals, who hold a current record of 39-18-1-2 (W-L-OTL-SOL), good for 81 points and tied for the best record in the entire American Hockey League. They are currently in first place in the Eastern Conference and East Division, and are riding a well-deserved 12-game win streak dating back to February 10th, which marks the longest winning streak in AHL Admirals history and the longest winning streak in the AHL this season.

Those numbers all seem like reputable reasons to write about this pro team in the local paper, yes? Or what about the animated fans that fill out the Scope on a regular basis? Having logged over 6 miles walking around with Gregory (in my comfortable shoes) through every crevice of the concourse, the ice, the locker rooms and more, it was evident a big part of his job was dealing with the fans. The loyal and avid bullhorn kind of fans, no less.

In all fairness, initially I didn’t think it was that big of a deal for the local paper’s omission until fan after fan approached Gregory up in arms about it. These fans mean business. They are proud of their team and they want the recognition. Not only do the Admirals have their hands in a number of worthy community endeavors, the roster boasts some big-time names, which will soon be in the bright lights of the NHL, including the AHL’s top goaltender in wins (Dustin Tokarski, 27) and top rookie scorer (Cory Conacher, 66 points on 31 goals and 35 assists). Not to mention Conacher is tied for second overall in the AHL in goals while ranking fourth overall in points. Mark Barberio leads all AHL defensemen in scoring (51 points on nine goals and 42 assists). It’s by no means a far stretch to say the Admirals are one of the best teams and have some of the best players in the AHL this season. Again, newsworthy, yes?

As the buzzer signaled a 2-0 victory over the Phantoms, Gregory is once again on the move. “Now we go say goodnight to all the fans,” he says, clearly valuing the support the locals put into his team. If he supports his fans, and his fans support his team, and his team is doing phenomenal on the ice heading toward the end of the season, shouldn’t our major print publications be supporting all of the above parties? To me, the answer it a clear yes. And hopefully it’s a clear yes before the Admirals head to the playoffs because there’s nothing worse than bandwagon sports reporting.

For more on the Admirals or to check their upcoming schedule, click here.

This article was featured on AltDaily, Hampton Roads’ source for creative culture, intelligent commentary and pressing news (and thanks to The Blonde Side, even a little bit of sports!).

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Material Video Interview


Sometimes The Blonde Side even does videos (no, not those kind mom). Check out this video with Kellie Lewis of Material during a party at SXSW in Austin. [Remember, if you want your very own custom Material shirt, be sure to mention The Blonde Side when placing your order for $5 off an already ridiculous price.] And big thanks to Brandon Prebynski for shooting and editing the video – even though he considered it something “straight off the O Network.”

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My Cinderella Story

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There comes a time in everyone’s life where bragging rights start to take over societal norms. For me, that was in 2006 and I still hold tight to those fleeting front-page memories probably the same way Britney Spears holds tight to her old Catholic schoolgirl hot bod. Those were the days, right?

And based on the picture to the left, it’s pretty obvious I’m a George Mason fan (and alum) and firmly believe they are one of the greatest Cinderella Stories in NCAA history, if not the greatest. Although, based on definition and parallels of the actual 1950 movie, I’m not sure anyone in NCAA Men’s Basketball has really fit the proverbial glass slipper to a T. Not even my Patriots if we’re being honest.

Most of you reading The Blonde Side should be acutely aware of what a Cinderella or “Cinderella Story” refers to, but since I know my mother is reading this (thanks mom), I’ll elaborate: this concept refers to a team or player who advances much further in a tournament than expected (via Wikipedia). The amount of media attention and bandwagon fans these Cinderellas get is b-a-n-a-n-a-s.

Take George Mason for instance – one of the biggest schools in Virginia, but because we lack a football team, we are either off the sport’s map completely or people assume we’re a small private school. Wrong. Wrong. And wrong’er.

But the thing that really bothers with me with this fairy tale analogy is that in the Disney classic, Cinderella just kind of shows up out of the woodwork and surprises everyone. Coming out of obscurity, much like George Mason did in that 2006 season when they stole the show as an 11 seed. The 2006 brackets were in worse shape than the Titanic marking the first time in 26 years that all four No. 1 seeds didn’t make the Final Four.

In the movie, Cinderella has to work harder and overcome multiple obstacles to get her shot at the prince. George Mason did that as well, but obviously not for their shot at a dude, but rather a bid into the dance and then the chance to keep advancing game after game after game.

George Mason Patriots - The Ultimate Cinderella Story

Here’s where I see the difference. In the movie, it’s all about the ending – Cinderella finding her Prince Charming (who by the way, for a cartoon character is totally my type for those keeping track). Sure, the story of how she got there and all the wicked haters (her stepsisters and stepmother) were part of the storyline, but the gist of the movie is that she made it. The slipper fit. The two lovebirds tie the knot, which is more than I can say for any of the twenty seasons of The Bachelor, but again, I digress.

The difference, as in most cases with the sporty Cinderella is it’s more about their journey. How they got the bid to the Madness that takes over March, all the teams with massive season highlight reels they took down to get there (Wichita State, UCONN, Michigan State and UNC), but then, unlike any Disney fairytale we’ve seen, the George Mason Patriots lost in the Final Four to Florida (just another reason I can’t stand those damn Gators).

While it was a good run, no make that a great run, this particular Cinderella Story, and all the other ones sports blogs and networks hammer on about end more like, well a Lifetime movie. In Lifetime movies, Tori Spelling (or one of their five other actresses they meticulously rotate) typically has a hard time trusting guys and doesn’t think she’ll ever fall in love, and then without warning (yeah right) she meets the love of her life. That’s where a typical Disney story would end – after a few babies of course. But no, she ends up getting brutally murdered by her doting husband while skiing down an Olympic mogul double-black after ACL surgery. Not that Mason got murdered by those damn Gators, but it was kind of hard to watch. I wasn’t left with warm and fuzzies like I am after watching Ariel get her legs for the final time to live as a human rather than an underwater mermaid or Sleeping Beauty wake up to a tongue in her mouth.

Doesn't look like the Cinderella we know from Disney, does it?

And of course it’s clear after watching VCU’s run last year (another Virginia school, mind you), that there may be more than one pair of glass slippers open for the taking. Butler had their shot at the slipper two years ago, but again, where’s that perfect Disney ending?

Who do you think has a chance at claiming this year’s slipper or at least trying to put a fat foot into it? Creighton? Saint Mary’s? Long Beach State?

PS – ever wonder where the term Cinderella came from? Thanks to Bill Murray’s impromptu line in Caddyshack, we can now successfully bridge Disney and Sports and feel OK about it.

For those of you gearing up for the Madness that is March, here is the 2012 NCAA Tournament Schedule:

Selection Sunday – March 11, National Bracket Day – March 12, First Four – March 13 – 14, Second Round – March 15 – 16, Third Round – March 17 – 18, Sweet 16 – March 22 – 23, Elite 8 – March 24 – 25, Final Four – March 31, National Championship – April 2

just another example of an awesome sign. AP Photos/Mark Humphrey

Oh, and contest galore. Two ways:

1. Two lucky readers of The Blonde Side will receive either a $50 Visa gift card or an NCAA team jersey. Simply leave a comment with what your favorite thing about the NCAA tournament and I’ll select two lucky random winners this week. If you win, you can pick either the gift card or an NCAA team jersey which will be mailed to you directly. Note, if your email address isn’t present, I’ll skip over you.

2. Want to see the action in person? AT&T is hosting a sweepstakes right now to go to the Final Four AND the Championship game! That’s right, you get to go to both. I’m jealous because I don’t think I’m eligible. To enter go to http://bit.ly/ATTSweeps  for details. What are you waiting for? Get in the game!

*A big thanks to AT&T who provided me with a gift card for promoting their sweepstakes but all thoughts and opinions on The Blonde Side and in this post are my own.

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FSU vs. Phillies

Photo courtesy of newstimes.com

Before you go assuming that a gal who writes something titled The Blonde Side made some super heinous mistake saying an NCAA baseball team played a pro team, take solace in the fact I know what I’m talking about. At least this once. Especially since I was there.

I should also note, that on a game schedule with 58 games for Florida State, only one of them is denoted with a “!” and that of course is this one.

Yesterday I had the chance to attend the Philadelphia Phillies first Spring Training game of 2012 at Bright House Field in Clearwater, FL against none other than my Florida State Seminoles. It’s not everyday you get to watch your favorite college team play the 2011 National League East champs in beautiful sunny 79 degree weather to kick off the season.

Many MLB teams pit their first game against a local (or in this case semi-local) team which does a lot for both teams and is an exciting atmosphere to take in a game. Yesterday’s game marks the 12th time Florida State has faced a major league team posting a record of 2-10 (including yesterday’s loss). Their only two wins come from beating the NY Yankees (1978) and the Atlanta Braves (1981), but the squad usually fares pretty well against these pro teams.

The experience breakdown for this 2012 Florida State squad has 17 players returning combined with 17 newcomers. The team is comprised of 7 seniors, 7 juniors, 2 redshirt sophomores, 3 sophomores, 1 redshirt freshman, and brand-spanking new 16 freshman. The Seminole baseball team is no stranger to wins and big games with 49 NCAA appearances, 20 CWS appearances and 5 ACC titles under the belt.

The fans appeared pretty evenly split at Bright House, but I can assure you when those garnet and gold pinstriped underdogs did something good, the crowd went wild. Even the crowd dressed in their Phillies garb. Case in point: when senior RHP Adam Simmons struck out big-leaguer Jim Thome (who recently just rejoined the Phillies organization) at the plate, the crowd went bananas. I’m talking Gwen Stefani B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

Another notable difference in a game like this? Seeing a collegiate pitcher hit a pro at the plate and then mouthing “sorry”. No where on a Major League mound will you see that sort of conciliatory emotion. It’s kind of refreshing to see, at least at the start of the season. I too have had many a smiles watching guys like Vincente Padilla terrorize batters and conversely, guys like Nyjer Morgan charge the mound or drop an F-bomb in the batter’s box.. Or four.

The Noles pitching and defense held the Phillies scoreless through 5, and then tied it up in the 7th after FSU capitalized and scored a run on a wild pitch. Like clockwork, the fans in the crowds started cheering:

F-L-O-R-I-D-A S-T-A-T-E / Florida State, Florida State, Florida State / wooooo!

The game definitely heated up in the 7th when senior RHP Mack Waugh got called for a balk and

FSU Head Coach, Mike Martin (photo courtesy of Zimbio)

Florida State head coach Mike Martin (currently in his 33rd season with a FSU record of 1673-577-4) went out to “talk” to the umpire which got fairly animated to say the least. It was the first standing ovation of the day.

How Martin didn’t get booted from the game was beyond me, but the guy was fearless and genius and I’m now a forever fan. Martin, no stranger to FSU or the game of baseball, graduated from Florida State in 1966 and went on to be drafted in the 25th round by the NY Mets later that year.

The Phillies eventually went on to win the game 6-1, where I’m sure all 4,399 fans at Bright House Field can vouch for the valiant effort put forth by the boys of Florida State.

Side note: something I learned – Spring Training games can end in a tie. Maybe that’s where Donovan McNabb got confused a few years ago?

Follow Florida State Baseball on Twitter @FSU_Baseball

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