Tag Archive for: LeBron James

Game Seven (photo via ESPN)

GAME SEVEN

Game Seven (photo via ESPN)

Game Seven (photo via ESPN)

Like every big championship or postseason, everyone has an opinion, including but limited to your local barista who probably doesn’t speak a lick of English yet somehow is convinced LeBron sucks.

Let’s get this out of the way; I’m a Heat fan. And for the sake of everyone calling me a bandwagon, it’s been documented on the world wide web for many years, but for you newbies, it dates back to 1995 when my neighbor, Alonzo Mourning, was traded to South Beach…err, Miami. So while it’s true I do love me some King James, chalk and all, the dude was in elementary school when I became a fan, and the same goes for the remaining parties in the Big Three.

But this NBA Finals matchup isn’t a piece of cake and it’s worthy of numerous debates and analytics – this isn’t Miami sweeping the Bucks or San Antonio dominating that trendy purple team from Los Angeles – this is the finals and these teams, both chock full of veterans are vying for the very same Larry O’Brien Championship Trophy. The series now tied at 3, all comes down to what ESPN calls the best two words in sports: Game 7. And I couldn’t agree more. (Although, it does seem rather pointless to have played six games which now seem completely irrelevant since it’s yet again back to the final score of one final game…)

Miami went into the finals with a franchise-best regular season record of 66-16 (yeah, that same team that went on a 27 game win streak earlier this year but can’t seem to win back-to-back in the postseason) and San Antonio with an almost equally impressive 58-24, who have been manhandling the Heat the same way the Kardashians did Kris Humphries.

If the Spurs win, it would be the fifth title in 15 years finally designating them as a Dynasty in many eyes, and if the Heat win, it’d be a back-to-back title win and the third in eight years – certainly not a bad matchup for a much anticipated series. Not to mention, with these two teams and their coaches’ decision to rest their big men in their only meeting earlier this year where Miami swept San Antonio 2-0, we don’t have much to gauge it on, who can guard who and who’s going to go off – most of it is just speculation, and CONGRATULATIONS, there you have 99% of all sports conversations EVER.

I get that most of y’all hate seeing one of those big-market teams dribble their way into the finals – unless you’re a hardcore Miami, LA or New York fan, you don’t really want to see them make it all the way, but you have to admit it makes for an interesting and entertaining series, one that NBA and TV execs are reveling in, as am I.

But let’s take a minute to debunk the biggest myth about this matchup that’s going around like a dirty rumor in a sorority house:

Age:

Believe it or not, as most media are desperately trying to make you believe, this isn’t an old geezer of a team competing against a brand spanking new squad with young legs. It isn’t David vs. Goliath, to be frank; it’s the Miami Heat against the San Antonio Spurs, a pretty damn even matchup, which this series, now tied, has very much indicated.

As Michael Rosenberg with SI wrote last week, “Yes everyone, the San Antonio Spurs are so old, the jokes about them being old are old. The biggest problem with the jokes? The Spurs are younger than the Heat.“

According to Rosenberg, in Game 1, the average age of a San Antonio player was 29.5 while the average age of a Miami player was 30.3. Sure, there’s a pretty hefty age gap between head coaches Spoelstra and Popovich, and even though Tim Duncan has played in an NBA Finals game in three separate decades, it isn’t nearly the disparity many think.

Miami: LeBron James: 28, Chris Bosh: 29, Dwyane Wade: 31, Shane Battier: 34, Mike Miller: 33, Udonis Haslem: 33, Ray Allen: 34

San Antonio: Tim Duncan: 37, Tony Parker: 31, Manu Ginobili: 35, Danny Green: 25, Kawhi Leonard: 21, Tracy McGrady: 34

And speaking of Tracy McGrady, that brings me to another very valid point, especially for those in good ole Texas, specifically Houston…

Do y’all really want to see San Antonio win this thing and hoist up that Larry O’Brien trophy just 200 miles West of us?

I see a lot of Houston rooting for San Antonio and I can’t figure out why. Is it that Texas pride bottled up inside you that just doesn’t die? Is the hatred for Kobe Bryant so far gone that the Texas folk are clamoring to see Tim Duncan get his fifth ring, which would tie him with the Black Mamba? Do y’all really hate Miami that much and if so, why? You can’t still be angry about The Decision, can you?

These are all questions the loud-mouthed fans at the bar can’t seem to answer when I pose them. Have y’all not forgotten about that T-Mac guy? Even Amanda Bynes could have handled his potentially faux injury causing him to hobble off the court and give up on the Rockets while still racking in a good portion of their salary cap. Rockets fans can’t want a guy who quit on them to win a ring, especially after joining a contender’s bench the last possible week of the season, can they? Is the I-10 rivalry only relevant in the regular season or just within the confines of our great ginormous state? What would Moses Malone think of you Red Rowdies jumping on the “Beat the Heat” bandwagon? Wow, sorry, lots of rhetoricals for ya.

But here’s my biggest question of all:

For those of you simply rooting for San Antonio because you “want to see a Texas team win,” let me ask you this – would Texans fans ever root for the Cowboys? They are still in Texas, am I right?

And just in case you aren’t a big basketball fan and looking for a reason to tune into the Finals, maybe one of these will help:

  1. Try counting the number of tattoos on Birdman (and see how many times he shoves guys in the paint)
  2. Check out the Heat Hater signs in the stands or marriage proposals or baby-daddy proclamations to LeBron
  3. Join the Twitter conversations and see what’s trending for the game. When LeBron lost his headband in the fourth quarter of Game 6, even the most novice sport’s fan would have been highly entertained.
  4. Who flops more: Chris Bosh, Shane Battier, LeBron James and Manu Ginobili (make a friendly wager with a friend during the game or that cute guy/girl next to you at the bar).

On a parting note, did you know Duncan, Parker and Ginobili are the only three teammates to make the NBA Finals four times who did not play for the Los Angeles Lakers or Boston Celtics? That sounds like a pretty Big Three if you ask me…

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LeBron #NoHeadband

#NoHeadband

LeBron #NoHeadband

LeBron #NoHeadband

Twitter does this funny thing during a big sporting event – it goes off, even when Chris Bosh doesn’t. There are many times Twitter and their beloved hashtags become more entertaining than the game itself. If last night wasn’t such a H-U-G-E comeback for the Heat in Game 6, Twitter and the #NoHeadband trend would have had my full attention.

LeBron losing his headband in the 4th quarter had the same effect a wardrobe change at a strip club does – it changes the game entirely. Losing that headband coincided exactly with the Heat turning around the subpar game of basketball they had been playing the previous three quarters. Or maybe it was also the yellow rope the arena crew was sectioning off in preparation for the inevitable Spurs postgame NBA Finals trophy presentation.

After two back-to-back postgame press conference questions fervently asking The King “about the play you lost your headband,” and SportsCenter noting that by 1am, there were 107 fake LeBron headband Twitter accounts, the headband thing took on a life of its own.

User @brendanohare hit the scenario head-on (no pun intended) with this tweet:

Imagine being someone who doesn’t follow sports and trying to figure out the connection between basketball and headbands right now—
Brendan O’Hare (@brendohare) June 19, 2013

We’re all still speculating and ramming our own recommendations down Twitter’s throat wondering if LeBron does in fact goes sans headband tomorrow night for the final game of the season, the same game ESPN says are the best two words in sports: Game 7.

For now, here are some of the funniest LeBron Headband tweets I saw floating around those crazy interwebs:

https://twitter.com/BrianMFloyd/status/347191779797377026

Racking up another triple-double and forcing winner takes all Game 7, Heat fans all across the country are pretty damn happy that headband was MIA.

To see all the funny tweets in the original article on CBS Man Cave Daily, click here.

You can also follow me on Twitter: @jaymelamm – although, full disclosure, I’m not nearly as funny as these characters. The witty nature comes and goes.

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A Disgruntled Heat Fan’s Observations From Game 5 in San Antonio

San Antonio, first of all, congrats on your successful blackout. Wait, nevermind.

Let me back up and start with this – I am in fact a disgruntled Miami Heat fan (not to be confused with a bandwagon disgruntled Heat fan), so any comments alluding to “she’s just pissed her team lost” will be rightfully ignored, dismissed and mocked because you my friend, are stating the obvious.

Here is my list of the 10 most annoying/random observations from my friend Drew and I last night at AT&T Center:

10. Hootie! I loved seeing Hootie sing the national anthem, but having Blowfish there would have been icing on the cake.

9. Inside Secrets. It was very San Antonio of you to have a mariachi band play a timeout at center court, but from a newbie to this arena, I was confused why this marked the loudest Spurs fans got all night. Were they talking shit about LeBron in Spanish and I just wasn’t aware? As always, I’m confused.

taco cabana

Nothing says KISS CAM like melted cheese San Antonio

 

8. Taco Cabana Kiss Cam. Call me a hopeless romantic, but don’t most stadiums/arenas have a more fitting sponsor for the in-game kiss cam? In Houston, they have a dentist promising beautiful smiles. But this go round in San Antonio, y’all have the Texan Taco Bell equivalent. Nothing spells romance like melted cheese. (Actually, that does sound awesome…).

lasik

Text LASIK for a bad officiating call in the NBA Finals 2013=

7. Text LASIK To 45384. Was it just me, or was it an eerie coincidence this particular advertisement only came up when there was an officiating call that didn’t go San Antonio’s way? Me thinks good ole David Stern would not endorse this particular sponsorship.

6. My homeboy, Alonzo Mourning. This guy is the whole reason I became a Heat fan back in 1995, and he was in attendance looking mighty dapper. But Zo got shitty seats, about six rows up from the court. I realize it’s an away game, but it’s ALONZO MOURNING. What happened to that Southern hospitality?

5. Rick Fox is not a VIP. Among other notable things, this cat was married to the beautiful Vanessa Williams, but the 3x NBA Champ had to go through the common folk entrance in front of a bunch of intoxicated and obnoxious fans (myself included) – just felt weird.

4. 80’s Cover band dressed like the Spurs Silver Dancers. The after party and free concert, Overtime, just outside the arena, featured a free concert from the entertaining 80s hair band Metal Shop. Metal Shop coincidentally was dressed very much like the Spurs dance team, keeping the crowd pumped up after the big win.

san antonio

The Coyote, sans pants

3. The Coyote. Does anyone else not think it’s super creepy the mascot wasn’t wearing pants? If I walked around the arena in just a Spurs jersey and no pants, I’d be arrested. Or the fact he had more costume changes (sometimes wearing game shorts or leather chaps) than Mariah Carey on an episode of MTV Cribs? Or the fact he was using a tiny piece of notebook paper with the words “GET LOUD” barely legible in black ink? With his feeble attempt at poster board signs, puffy paint and construction paper as props, I’m scared to ask if a small child is missing half his science project somewhere around the San Antonio area. The only sign that was big enough to see had upside down words! And perhaps it’s important to note that only in Texas can someone dressed in costume stand in front of 18k+ people and shoot a gun into the crowd.

2. The Blackout that wasn’t. This was the worst blackout ever for multiple reasons. Even when the team gave 18k+ fans a FREE Spurs t-shirt on their seats before the game, only 1/3 actually wore the shirts (or anything black). Oh and by the way, did anyone realize it was Miami who wore black uniforms during your beloved blackout while the Spurs wore white? Was there some miscommunication there?

1. Chris Bosh. 

In all honestly, San Antonio dominated my home team last night and deserved to take the series 3-2. The fans were friendly and despite the loss and dismal play by Miami, it was a great atmosphere for any sports fan. As I mentioned to my friend Drew after the game, I proclaimed Miami is a much better team than San Antonio, to which he casually and intelligently replied, “that’s why it’s a 7-game series – whoever wins is the better team.”

To read this original article and The Blonde Side’s column on COED Magazine, click here.

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NBA Finals 2012 Preview

2012 NBA Finals: Kevin Durant vs. LeBron James

For the NBA season that-almost-wasn’t coming to a close, David Stern could not have scripted a better matchup than the two best players in the league meeting for only the third time this season; putting it all on the line for the coveted Larry O’Brien Trophy.

None of the writers from any of the multiple Real Housewives series could have strategically set up a better finale: three-time MVP LeBron Raymone James taking on three-time scoring champ Kevin Wayne Durant.

The Heat are the two-time defending Eastern Conference champions back for revenge and bloody eyebrows after having to start this NBA season on Christmas Day watching the Dallas Mavericks banner raising ceremony in that other American Airlines branded facility. If that does not hurt worse than a Chris Bosh ab injury, I don’t know what does.

But which team has the edge here?

Click to read the full article on Bleacher Report.

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No Time To Celebrate Last Year’s Successes

With 48 seconds left on the pregame clock before the Mavs’ season opener, the Miami Heat scurried off the court into the dark quarters of the visiting locker room. On the court, however, the Mavs and their fans celebrated something they’ve waited 31 long-suffering years for – the raising of a NBA Championship banner to proudly hang at American Airlines Center.

What better way for Mavs fans to celebrate Christmas than with the finest gift the NBA offers – the championship banner, which even came wrapped in black cloth like a regular ol’ Christmas present. The historical ceremony was chock full of last season’s highlights including dunks from Dirk, multiple fadeaways against none other than Miami’s big three, more dunks from Dirk, Jason Kidd getting fouled in the paint and more violent dunks from Dirk over LeBron’s head-banded head. With every memorable basket the crowd grew louder and louder with uncontrollable passion.

After the game, the media questioned Coach Spoelstra on his team’s absence on the court during the ceremonious banner raising. The media has been buzzing with rumors on how the big three, especially former finals MVP Dwyane Wade would feel during the ceremony having been on the other side; the literal other side when the Heat beat the Mavs back in the 2006 finals. “We did it out of respect. Other teams do that when we retire jerseys – it’s their moment. That’s a good storyline, but we did it out of respect, no other reason,” Spoelstra said in response to the media’s bait.

But it wasn’t LeBron who got the biggest boos of the day; no, those were reserved for none other than Commissioner David Stern. Every single fan clad in Mavs blue directed their audible criticisms at The Commish – all while the poor guy was congratulating the hometown champs and their city on last year’s prodigious victory. Knowing his recent standings with fans, he kept his approbatory speech short and sweet – less than 53 seconds of talk time from the man many hold solely responsible for the shortened season (now a 66 game season versus the customary 82). Stern quickly handed the microphone over to Jason Terry and the sold-out crowd once again erupted with triumph.

But not for long. As soon as the banner reached the top of the JumboTron, fans ran out of things to celebrate. The only time the Mavs actually led the Heat was when Chris Bosh muffed up yet another tipoff. Shortly after, the celebrations for the hometown team quieted down only to pique once more for the standing ovation they gave Lamar Odom as he entered the game in the first quarter. Rightly so, because just seconds after, he drained his first shot in a Mavs uniform, sinking a three-pointer from behind the arch. Fans went wild. Probably more so for Khlomar, but wild, nonetheless.

Heading into the game, the Mavs were the only active team undefeated on Christmas day (2-0), but the Heat came to play with a lot to prove. As one member of the media commented outside their locker room, “they [Heat] played angry.” And not just because their last game was a loss on their own home court, which cost them their very own championship banner in “South Beach,” but the last time the Heat beat the Mavericks in the regular season was March 26, 2004. That’s a whole lot of love lost for the two teams.

These two teams have had a lot of back in forth in the way of stats. Eight of the last 10 defending champs have followed their championship season with a season-opening victory the next year. The last team to lose a season-opener after winning it all? You guessed it – the Miami Heat. On June 12, 2011 when the Mavs secured their first NBA title in franchise history, they beat the Heat on the road 105 – 95. Yesterday afternoon, Miami virtually reversed those numbers winning 105-94.

As a highly publicized finals rematch, there wasn’t much for the Mavs to celebrate or look at, unless you counted the pretty new banner. While it’s only the first game of the season, fans are hoping they are left with much more than a ticket stub and replica championship banner to hang in their homes and offices. With the abbreviated season already in motion, the Mavs don’t have the luxury of sitting around and applauding themselves on last year’s success – it’s time to play ball like the champions they are.

While the Mavs certainly had something to celebrate before the game, it became clear after the game they have more work than celebration ahead of them. Lets hope they bring the A-game that Dallas fans have become accustomed to sooner rather than later.  Game two saw a similar result against the Denver Nuggets. Their third attempt to get it straightened out is tonight in Oklahoma City – It doesn’t get any easier.

This article was featured on Scoreboard Daily, a comprehensive sport’s publication in Dallas/Fort Worth.

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Merry Quitness

Merry Quitness – My Book Review of The Whore Of Akron

After reading every word of Scott Raab’s 300-page book, The Whore of Akron: One Man’s Search for the Soul of LeBron James, I find myself still questioning if I can relate or take at face value his extreme disdain for LeBron James and his multiple indiscretions and ultimately, The Decision.

Being from Virginia, a hometown loyalty to any team in sports is lost on me. As a state, we have no collective team (the Redskins surely don’t count, because they are the Washington Redskins, and more confusingly, their stadium is in Landover, Maryland). While that is in no way to say Virginians can’t be loyal fans, that whole “I live and die by Cleveland sport’s” mentality in which Raab bears is not something I can genuinely relate to. My loyalties to teams are as follows (and in order), the Philadelphia Eagles, the Texas Rangers (thanks to the 1993 Nolan Ryan and Robin Ventura fight which proved to my father that sometimes fighting is a legitimate necessity), and yes, loyally amidst all the bandwagoners, I am a Miami Heat fan.

Before you continue reading, here is full disclosure in its purest form: I think Scott Raab is one hell of a writer. He’s one of the reasons I want my own byline in Esquire, hopefully very soon. I also love my Miami Heat (with or without King James), but as he leads my team to hopefully another run at the Championship (this time winning), I too, support him. After reading this in-depth view of Raab’s transparent hate for LeBron, it makes me want to personally alert a team of armed guards for LBJ’s protection, but as a sport’s fanatic myself, and one who relies heavily on the First Amendment, I can somewhat relate and surely appreciate.

Cleveland fans have had a rough go, easily summed up here: “It is forever fourth down and 98 yards to go here, the Broncos’ ball, with the Browns four minutes from their first Super Bowl; forever the ninth inning of Game 7, the Tribe leading by a run, three outs away from their first World Series win since 1948; forever the last second of Game 5 against the Bulls in 1989, with the Cavaliers up one and Michael Jordan with the ball.” Raab set out to write a book about the LeBron legacy, but like a drunk Snooki, things quickly changed. Raab had high hopes that LeBron would change all the negative and heartbroken hysteria highlighted above, but the second his “loyalty” hit ESPN, Raab and many other fans set out for revenge on King James. Or more accurately, the 3,600 seconds he plastered said loyalty over a supposed unbiased network.

There are many parts of this book I can’t relate to – the constant and lifelong heartache the Cleveland sport’s community feels, the infinite Jewish references, and the constant visual images of Raab asking for (or more commonly being offered) handjobs by his doting wife Lisa. No one has ever offered me a handjob (or asked for one) after watching LeBron post his fifteenth straight triple-double.

I like to think of myself as a loyal person, but it’s hard to put myself in LeBron’s Nikes. Sure, it would have been a storybook fairytale in any arena had he stayed with the Cavs and finally brought a ring to a city that so desperately needed and wanted it. But I ask myself, if I had a boyfriend of seven years who I loved dearly, but the chance to be with my girl crush Jessica Biel presented itself, would I remain loyal to said boyfriend? Ideally he’d be all for it and allow me to have both him and J. Biel, but things don’t quite work like that in the NBA. LeBron didn’t have the choice to stay loyal and get a ring. Or did he?

“Those Cleveland fans knew for the first time what utter fools they had been to believe that LeBron James ever gave a damn about anything but LeBron James.” One of Raab’s rants tackling an interview LeBron gave after his egotistical highlight, The Decision: “Maybe the ones burning my jersey were never LeBron fans anyway.” Raab brings up a supremely cogent point, which many young athletes as well as fans don’t get. It’s the whole rooting for laundry concept. You aren’t a fan of that particular player or even that jersey – “the names on the back of the jersey will change as the years go by.” Cleveland fans loved LeBron and rooted for him because he was on their team, not the other way around. LeBron was the first one-namer the town of Cleveland has ever recognized, but with no rings, perhaps it was all in vain.

But one question I still have: can you blame him?

Raab is spot-on when he calls LeBron, “A brand name with no more substance than a marketing plan to move shoes and soft drinks,” but sadly and truly, isn’t that what sports have become? Long gone are the days where loyal and respectable players like Craig Biggio, Walter Payton, Larry Bird, Cal Ripken Jr., David Robinson and Ryan Giggs abound. We are starting to see more and more King James’ across the leagues that have the ability to hold acronyms like ESPN and NBA by the balls since day one.

Raab reminds us as fans, your voice may be gone from screaming profanities and cheers in stadiums, arenas or your rocking chair at home, but your heart? Your heart should never be gone. Spoken like a true Cleveland native.

As it doesn’t look like Clevelanders will be getting any championships this Christmas, may I suggest this book as a damn fine consolation prize? Due to LeBron’s multiple playoff breakdowns, you can easily wrap the gift and label it “Merry Quitness” for sport’s fans everywhere. Yes, even Heat fans. Because if there’s one thing you can’t debate about King James, it’s his 4th quarter playoff disappearances.

Buy The Book.

Dear Raab,

Please continue to hang on to your Browns ticket stub from 1964 and I’ll hold on to this book you sent me with post-it flags and scribbled up margins, serving as reminders to us both for the hope and dreams we are each holding out for. You, that you and your city will once again see another Championship of some kind, and me, that being a sport’s writer letting it all hang out, may some day get me a book deal and notoriety that only true greats indeed accomplish.

Thanks again for the book. I do expect an autograph if we ever meet. 

This article was featured on Culture Map, Houston’s Daily Digital Magazine in the sport’s section.

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