Everyone has that one “thing” they spend too much money on or trying to keep up with the latest trends. For some it’s purses or shoes, but for me – it’s active apparel and workout wear, since that’s pretty much the only thing you ever see me in. (Seriously, my online dating profile clearly warns men that I’m always in yoga pants.)
On a recent visit to Austin for the X Games, I was introduced toFitFit, which is a line of unique, bold active apparel. And of course I fell in love. Not just with the designs and bright colors, but the feel. These are the softest pants I’ve ever put on my body.
Based in Austin and made in Brazil, the leggings are perfect for yoga, running, spin, barre or even lounging. One of the hottest new trends in active apparel, the vibrant leggings from FitFit are not only breathable, comfortable and fast-drying, but also stretch and fade-resistant – so they can stay in your closet longer. And did I mention how comfortable they are?
The pants (the only thing I’ve tried so far) fit really well – a lot of yoga/running pants give me
TRX Training at Sculpt in Houston with FitFit pants
muffin top (yes, I am blaming the actual pants for that), but these fit snug around my waist as they should, but not too tight and stay in place. I’ve done as much as a six-mile run wearing these and they don’t fall down or sag like a few other brands I’ve tried – they are perfect.
They have been perfect for my HIIT sessions at Sculpt Fitness, as well as TRX, yoga and SPX.
Probably not great for my wallet, but I love the fact they come out with as many as 10 new prints every 6-8 weeks. That way you can stay up on the trends and keep yourself motivated during those harder workouts.
If you order online (they are in a few locations locally in Austin), there is a flat fee of $6 for shipping within the US, so stock up!
Lets face it – sometimes your workout gets boring, but that doesn’t mean your workout pants have to be.
If you’ve been following the blog, you’ll know that after many years of debate, I recently decided to take up golf. Thanks to a great new partnership with Callaway, I’m learning the game and sharing my experiences with my readers. And guess what – that includes trying out some great brands of women’s golf apparel like Lizzie Driver.
One thing I’ve always known (or at least thought) about golf is that most places have a pretty strict dress code, but that isn’t always the case. (Pro tip: call the course ahead of time or check their website for exact specifics.) Typically a collared shirt is a must for men and women and you want to look conservative for the most part – a word that doesn’t usually describe my personality or my style. Off to a good start…
The pieces I’ve worn from the Lizzie Driver collection fit extremely well and are the perfect balance of fashion and function. During a round of golf you need to wear clothes that move with you and don’t restrict your swing (see how professional I sound there?). Lizzie Driver makes a conscious effort to use the best fabrics and pay close attention to style, detail and fit – all things that can make you at least look the part on the golf course.
My critique: Since I’m pretty short (5-foot-2), the skorts and shorts are a little long for my liking. Of course you can get it altered, but I’m a big fan of all their collared shirts, especially in this brutal Texas heat, they remain breathable.
My favorite: If I had my way, I would never wear sleeves, and I love their selection of sleeveless
A little more about the brand: America’s fastest-growing women’s golf-lifestyle line, Lizzie Driver was founded in 2011 by close friends Karen Preston and Lorrie Forgatch. After successful careers in business and raising children, the two partnered to create beautiful golf apparel that aligned with their off-course wardrobes. Their vision was to develop a collection that functions equally well on the country club fairway as at meetings, social events or almost any other activity in a busy woman’s life. They christened their brand Lizzie Driver by combining their shared middle name – Elizabeth – with that of the “golf club that goes the farthest.”
Bracelet from psfortysix – my best friend’s name in Braille to wear as a reminder of how much she meant to me
Without a doubt, the piece below is the single most important and heartfelt thing I’ve ever written. I was assigned this story a year ago for a major print publication to share my story with other women who may have or may end up battling a similar situation. After review, they somehow deemed it too graphic and decided not to publish it. But that hasn’t stopped me.
Today, September 10th, is World Prevention Suicide Day. It is not a day I feel more pain than usual, nor is it a day where I feel less pain. It’s just another day dealing with losing my best friend to mental illness. And it’s another day – a big scale day with the potential to reach thousands – that I can share my story and hopefully change the lives of just one human out there.
The bracelet pictured is from my good friend Kaci at psfortysix.etsy.com. She knew I wanted something to commemorate my friend and serve as a reminder that I was lucky enough to have in her life, so she made one with her name in braille. It just may be the best gift I’ve ever received, ever.
Before going into my story, let me make one thing clear – I will make ZERO dollars off you reading or sharing this article. It won’t bring my best friend back. I only have one wish in sharing this story: for you to take just four minutes out of your busy Thursday to read it. Think on it. Share it if you want. Reach out to a friend and tell him or her how much you love her. Pray for someone struggling. Whatever it is you do, do it. That’s all.
Here goes my story…
My best friend was a raging b*tch.
Turns out there were actually a few medical terms for bitch, such as manic, depressed, and bipolar.
At the time I turned my back on her, I felt totally justified in doing so. Sure it was hard. I missed her everyday and wanted to call and make up, but I stood my ground. I wanted her to apologize and go back to the way things used to be. But she never apologized. That was the last time I spoke to Elizabeth.
She committed suicide.
Knowing what I know now, the guilt is overwhelming, to say the least. I know it wasn’t my fault and I was one of the only ones who stood by her side for so long. We always hear “you’re never promised tomorrow” and see the inspiring image quotes all over Instagram, but who actually thinks it’s a phrase they’ll have to live with for the rest of their lives? I certainly didn’t, but now it’s my reality.
Elizabeth was clinically depressed. I knew that early on in our friendship when we met in college. She was fairly open about her illness, especially since I was her best friend and we shared everything. She’d go through her ups and downs and change medications, but for the most part she always remained the Elizabeth I knew and loved. Even throughout her episodes and serious bouts of depression, she was still the bright-eyed smiling brunette who treated me better than any friend ever had. We talked about her depression only when she brought it up and when prompted I’d offer my own generic advice – something I wasn’t nearly qualified for, but I had no idea the seriousness of her illness. “Hang in there,” and “You’re tough,” or “This too shall pass,” wasn’t what Elizabeth needed.
She needed help from a professional.
One of the things I regret most is not pushing harder to help her find the right help. Clearly it was well above the best friend pay-grade, but that shouldn’t have stopped me. Her parents were fairly active in helping her get better – making sure she went to therapy and being there the best they could, but I’m not sure even they knew how serious it was. I went on family vacations with them and to this day I literally want to beat myself up over why her mother and I never had a heart-to-heart about Elizabeth’s illness.
Why didn’t I ask more questions to understand better? Why didn’t she give me guidance? She always told me how important I was in Elizabeth’s life and how much they appreciated me, but in the end it just wasn’t enough.
No one ever told me what it took to be the best friend of someone battling a mental disease. We were girls – we had our completely crazy moments getting mad over boys, our sorority arguments, borrowed clothes and the like. We’d hang up on each other (back when you could actually dramatically hang up the phone, not like now with cell phones) and all the usual stuff best friends did. Bickering is a part of any relationship, and it was always easy to forget and move on after your typical argument. The problem was, in the height of Elizabeth’s mania, no argument was typical.
When Elizabeth would have one of her episodes she went straight for the jugular. I always took it personally without realizing it was her illness talking or the change in medications, which affected her more than I ever knew.
Months would go by where she was a complete zombie void of any personality whatsoever. The medicine took all the things that made her my best friend. It was miserable because she had such a goofy demeanor and caring soul, and it would just disappear without warning.
Our big fight came when Elizabeth and I went to LA for a girl’s weekend. She was getting over a bad breakup and needed to get away. She even offered to pay for my portion of the trip since money was tight – that was her generous nature that never wavered. (I remember as broke college students, Elizabeth would use her parent’s credit card at the mall for the 5 for $25 panties at Victoria’s Secret and she’d always let me pick out two pairs for myself so I didn’t feel left out.) She always took care of me, but that didn’t make up for the way she treated me on her bad days.
She’d lash out at me out of nowhere. She even slapped me during that trip in LA. I’d had enough. No airline ticket was worth being treated that way. I knew she had just started taking a very high dose of Lithium, but I just assumed it was another medication.
Turns out, Lithium is an extremely toxic mind and body altering drug, especially in the beginning when your dosage isn’t quite set to match your chemical imbalances. It’s a very trial and error and then re-dose kind of drug. It also turns out drinking alcohol on Lithium is one of the biggest no-no’s. The combination of Elizabeth’s mania, the Lithium, and alcohol on that trip turned her not only into a person I no longer knew, but a person I no longer wanted to call my best friend.
At that moment and for months following, it felt justified. I knew I deserved a better friend.
I have reasoned with myself over the last year and have finally realized I’m not to blame for Elizabeth’s illness, her outbursts or her subsequent suicide. But I’ve also realized I should have done more as her friend.
I should have been proactive and learned the side effects of her medications or been in better
Stop Suicide. Today, Tomorrow and Every Day.
contact with her parents as to her current state of mind and emotional well-being. Knowing just a few martinis were the catalyst for losing my best friend forever is probably the hardest thing I’ve had to accept in my life. Had I known alcohol was not good to mix with her medication, I would have happily welcomed an entire weekend in Los Angeles sans the bar scene. My friends always have and always will be more important than any Cosmopolitan, no matter how bonding and friendly it looks on Sex And The City.
I’m not sure anything I could have done would ensure Elizabeth would still be here today, but I do know I could have been by her side until the end. Maybe even holding her hand and telling her how much I loved her. I don’t think there’s any amount of “good friend genes” that can prevent suicide when someone is that sick.
Because let’s be honest – mental illness is a sickness.
Knowing she left this earth without her best friend by her side is something I will always have to live with, but it’s something I’ve wanted to share because if I could go back in time and be a more proactive and understanding friend, I might not feel such immense guilt. I’m sure there are others in similar friendships and I want them to know there are things you can and should do, other than turn your back like I did.
I spoke with Kristen Martinez, a therapist in private practice at Pacific NorthWell in downtown Seattle, who is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor Associate (LMHCA) in Washington State and a National Certified Counselor (NCC). Here are some tips she offered for dealing with a friend suffering from mental illness:
In order to be a good friend to someone with severe mental health issues, you should first and foremost know what diagnosis they have and what are typical symptoms of the diagnosis. If you know someone well enough or for long enough, you can most likely tell when they are feeling or acting “off” (i.e., their symptoms are acting up).
It is also helpful to know the medication(s) your friend is taking, as well as symptoms and side effects. If you are very close with them and see them daily (such as a roommate), it is helpful to know their schedule for taking medications so that they don’t accidentally miss a dosage. If the two friends live together, post this information on the fridge or some other common area so it is in plain view of both friends. Also if they live together, keep the friend’s psychiatrist info handy.
If you are the one with mental health issues, be honest with your friend about how you are feeling or what you are thinking. They care about you and want the best for you. You may need to educate your friend about mental illness. And vice versa, if you are the friend – ask questions, be curious, do your research, but don’t patronize your friend or treat them differently just because they now have a diagnosis.
It would be helpful to draw up a safety plan with a close friend regarding suicidal feelings/thoughts or a psychotic break. It is important to know who to call and what to do before the emergency occurs (if it ever does).
The above tips from Martinez are just a few I wish I’d known while dealing with Elizabeth. There’s certainly no guarantee she’d still be here on this earth had I created an emergency plan or researched her meds, but I’d have a lot more confidence that I did all that I could.
I hope just one person out there reads this and understands my pain and the one thing I would change if I could. I would have never turned my back on my sweet friend had I known it was her illness taking over her sweet soul, and not just ill-advised hormones that could have been easily prevented. It’s the sad fact like so many things in life, that we learn those incredibly important lessons too late and hindsight is always 20/20.
I dedicate this day and this blog to Elizabeth and all the amazing people she left on this earth. I can’t understand suicide as a way out, but that’s not for me to judge. The guilt throughout all of this has been extremely hard, but I know she’d forgive me. I know she still holds my hand and cheers on my football team during the season. Throughout every outburst, beneath it all, she loved me to the core. I wish I could have seen that back then. I’d still miss her just as much as I do now, but maybe, just maybe, the guilt would be a little less.
To order a special bracelet for someone you lost and loved hard, check out psfortysix.etsy.com on Etsy. A portion of sales will be going back to a charity related to suicide and mental illness (still TBD).
https://theblondeside.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/IMG_8908.jpg640640Jaymehttps://theblondeside.com//wp-content/uploads/2018/06/1526998321020-300x192.pngJayme2015-09-10 01:14:332015-09-14 12:31:29Suicide Took My Best Friend
Purchase the exclusive Project 88 handbag for just $188.88! Authentic Italian leather, designed by August California.
The price tag $188.88 may seem like a lot for a bag, but it’s the incredibly worthy cause behind the bag that’s really worth the money. Not to mention it’s downright cute and made of authentic Italian leather…
You’ve heard me go on and on about how much I just adore Project 88 Foundation since it started just a few months ago, co-founded by Houston Texans tight-end Garrett Graham and his ridiculously impressive wife (and yes, I’ll say it again – the bombshell that she is) Ericka.
Not only do you get to own one of these perfectly-sized and wonderfully crafted bags, but the proceeds will help support certified college advisors in Houston Public schools as well as provide scholarships for summer leadership camps.
Here’s a quick Q&A with one of my favorite Texan wives and all the hard work she’s putting into Project 88 Foundation. You’ll be amazed at how much they’ve accomplished in such a short amount of time (I know I am!).
The Blonde Side: Short version – what is Project 88?
Ericka Graham: We connect low-income and underserved students to college advisors and leadership training. In one sentence: We connect students to OPPORTUNITY!
TBS: What are your successes so far?
EG: After raising over $300,000, Project 88 was able to:
1. Sponsor 8 AdviseTX college advisors in 8 HISD Schools: Davis High School, Yates High School, Chavez High School, Washington High School, Sam Houston High School, Barbara Jordan High School, Sterling High School, and Waltrip High School
2. We also sent our Project 88 Young Leadership Board to a leadership camp this summer (Eagle University) and we are bringing Eagle University to Houston next summer, on the Rice University Campus—for 100 students!
3. In addition to hosting a summer camp for 100 students next year, we also had the opportunity to host and sponsor the first ever EMERGing leadership institute at Rice University. At this event, first-generation-college students were able to explore the challenges of being first generation, while also receiving hands-on coaching from leadership professionals and college professors at Rice University.
TBS: Favorite part of Project 88?
EG: I never have to wake up, and question if my work is meaningful. I think of our Project 88 students and the students that will go to college because of our sponsored advisors, and I know that we can and will change lives and create generational change in this city.
TBS: So you’re selling bags now?
EG: Selling bags is a fun way to promote our organization and raise money at the same time. I knew I wanted to do something on August 8th (because the date is 8-8) so I figured that launching a product would be a fun thing to do. I also know girls in Houston love to shop, and with a partner like August California to work with, creating the concept and vision for the Project 88 bag was super fun! we wanted to sell a bag that would last, keep you organized, and be color neutral, and our Project 88 Portofino Pouchette made and designed by August California was the perfect fit!
TBS: The price?
EG: Our bags are $188.88, and you can find them on project88bag.org
TBS: Where will the money go?
EG: The money raised by theses bags will help fund camp tuition for Eagle University summer camp! 100% of the proceeds go to Project 88.
TBS: I obviously get the play on the #88, but what exactly will $188.88 do?
EG: $188.88 will cover one students meal tickets and books/materials for summer camp.
TBS: My readers many want to help. How can they help RIGHT NOW (other than buying one of these great bags!)?
EG: Right now we are looking for corporate sponsors for our Gala and Golf Outing in April, as well as volunteers for our summer camp in 2016.
TBS: Since this is The Blonde Side and you’re one of my favorite blondes, tell me a blonde joke:
A big thanks to the Grahams for always working so diligently to give back in a way that will affect these students lives well beyond their college years. Please take a minute to check out their site, and join them on FB for updates.
https://theblondeside.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/Screen-Shot-2015-09-09-at-12.39.56-AM.png333607Jaymehttps://theblondeside.com//wp-content/uploads/2018/06/1526998321020-300x192.pngJayme2015-09-09 00:52:332015-09-09 09:05:37Project 88 Handbags – Looking Good and Doing Good
ANNOUNCEMENT: The Blonde Side is starting a blog series with Callaway Golf.
I’m still pretty new to the game, but curious (guys & girls) what questions you have about the sport or what do you wish your friends/significant others knew about the sport?
It can be anything from dress code, golf etiquette, how to begin, picking your clubs, stats and fun facts about the game or a particular player?
This will help us create a well-rounded series to help teach you (and me!) a little more about a game I’m starting to fall in love with!
https://theblondeside.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/CNWMTE7VAAAclBD.jpg600600Jaymehttps://theblondeside.com//wp-content/uploads/2018/06/1526998321020-300x192.pngJayme2015-08-27 11:40:262015-10-01 17:23:06Callaway: New Sponsor
After an experience last week, this is a simple guideline Sally recommended to check myself (before I literally wreck myself).
Last week I was on a press trip with eight other travel bloggers/writers. It’s always a unique gathering of quirky individuals (definitely included myself in that descriptor) from all parts of the world with different views on pretty much everything.
During our trip, one of the girls casually said, “you sure do moan a lot.” My response at the time was that I was just saying what everyone else was thinking.
I’ve had a few days to think about it, and she was right. Up until now I justified my “moaning” and complaining two ways: people have always said they love how unfiltered I live my life and how open I am about things and many times I’m just making an observation, not necessarily complaining.
But if a complete stranger (a sweet one at that) can say this after knowing me for a few days, there’s got to be some truth behind it. And if I’m being totally honest, I’ve often questioned this before.
I dated this guy for a while. He was an awful boyfriend and is an awful human (those of you who know me, can you guess who?), but at one point during our relationship he made an extremely valid point that has stuck with me.
One of the toughest parts about my job as a writer is that I communicate for a living. Think about that for a moment. I get paid to talk (or write), and I pride myself on not keeping things bottled up inside. At one point he told me that I don’t need to tell him everything.
When you’re in a relationship, things are always going to bother you. He’s going to drive under the speed limit (a huge pet-peeve of mine), he’ll chew his gum too loudly, he’ll forget to text back – whatever it may be. But if you constantly nag and tell him (or even just a friend or co-worker) all the things they are doing wrong, it gets old. Real quick.
If a healthy and loving relationship is at the top of things I want in life right now, I need to remember to look at the positive side, and that goes for everything in life.
Sally also told me about the 10/10/10 rule:
Ask yourself – will this matter in 10 minutes, 10 weeks or 10 years? She says there are levels of discernment and I don’t have to totally censor myself. I should remain true to myself, but I should ask does this really matter, before I jump into saying my thoughts out-loud?
So that’s my main homework this week: to basically think before I speak and ask myself – is it kind, is it true, is it necessary. Necessary is the one I need to pay the most attention to. What about you?
She also re-reminded me that I need to start meditating and suggested this article from Mindful to explain the process a bit better.
My other piece of homework is to work on my vision. Think Big she says. Sally says to visualize what you want, to make it known to those around you. The more you think about it and visualize it, the more you believe it and the best part? She says everything I’ve told her I wanted, I deserve it. That’s what I need to remember.
Meet my life coach Sally (from Whole Life Strategies) here. She does all of her life coaching sessions online, and over the past month, she has been a huge help in keeping things in perspective and helping me move forward instead of remaining stuck like I have been.
Everyone always says life doesn’t have to be so complicated. If that’s true, then WHY IS IT SO DAMN COMPLICATED?
Maybe it’s just my life, but nothing seems easy. Absolutely nothing. Going to the post office? A nightmare and then some. Paying a bill online? Some new glitch in the system, always. Go out of town and your power “accidentally” gets turned off. It’s always something.
So imagine my surprise when my session this morning started off with, “Start with a celebration – what’s going right?”
Funny how that simple question made the wheels in my head start turning. I was so ready (as always) to talk about what’s wrong and what needs to be fixed that I rarely take the time to say, “hell yes, this is awesome,” about a situation I’m in.
Sally told me she’s starting to see a theme in our conversations – I’m really hard on myself. Truth of the matter is, she’s right. I have to be. I don’t have a family around me praising me or telling me what I need to do, I don’t have a boss or co-workers, or a roommate, it’s really just me, so I have to be hard on myself.
Part of my action plan/homework this week is to pay attention to the language I use towards myself. Instead of yelling at myself, fuming and saying, “I’m so lazy, I have too much shit lying around the house, I should have done this weeks ago,” I should rephrase it along the lines of, “I’m a person who values a simple life, lets spend time to get rid of old stuff.” I don’t know if I’m sold on that process, but I’m willing to give it a try.
We also talked about my dating life. I mean, what is a life coaching session for a 33-year-old single female without talking about the lack of a dating life?
I recently (super briefly) “dated” a guy who was all wrong for me. I mean, if I had to write down everything I didn’t want in a guy, it would have been this guy’s exact dating profile. I won’t go into details, but basically, he’s a lot younger than me, he still lives at home (seriously, slap me when you see me), doesn’t really have a job, and a bunch of other nonsense.
As I was telling Sally how I knew from the start it wouldn’t last and it was a stupid idea, I also said I liked the idea of feeling wanted. I’m that hopeless romantic who likes to hold hands and cuddle (at least before it’s time to actually sleep, then roll over out of my way please) and in the end I really want that happily ever after. This guy would have never given that to me. I’m not sure he’ll ever give that to anyone, but that’s a different story.
Anyways, after telling Sally about this situation and her remaining completely non-judgemental, which was shocking, she said something pretty profound. “Dating someone you know you don’t want isn’t valuing yourself.”
Judge me all you want, but one of my biggest goals in life (yes, I used the word goals here) is to find a man I can start a life and a family with. Sally made me realize that if I’m busy spending my time hanging out with a kid who can’t give me what I want, then I’m not valuing myself and the things I really want in life.
My homework this week includes:
– Declutter. I want simplicity in my life and if you’ve ever seen my apartment, I’ve got shit to do.
– Be clear on the guy I want. Make a list. Sally says to “be hardcore about it.”
– Join a dating site. (Still debating this since I haven’t had much luck finding the non-crazies out there. If you’ve had good experiences on one or know anyone single in the Houston area, be sure to holler…)
– Start meditating for five minutes a day. I am still trying to get better at this.
– Take one step towards publishing my memoir. This is a very big item on my to-do list and it’s just been sitting there, idle. I need to start reaching out to literary agents and publishers again, just one step at a time.
Learn more about my life coach Sally and her Whole Life Strategies business here.
What if it was OK to just be thankful for what you’re thankful for?
That’s how my third session with my life coach (Sally) started. Sally started by asking me a tough question – what do you like about yourself and what do you value?
That should not have been a tough question, right? But sadly, it was. I’m not sure if that’s tough for other people to answer like it was for me, but I think I had so many small things I liked about myself and not one giant thing, that they all seemed minuscule and kind of embarrassing and not worth mentioning.
Since I literally work with words for a living, the semantics of the word value always throws me off. But something I have always prided myself on is being thankful and saying it as much as possible.
For instance, in my line of work, someone stepping out and offering to help by proofreading my work, or introducing others in the industry to me, or brainstorming ideas is pretty rare. A few people off the top of my head that have done that and stood out are Will Carroll, Arash Markazi, Megan Brown and Baxter Holmes (he’s the most recent). These are all badasses that have made a name for themselves in the sports and/or media world and get nothing out of helping me out, but they do.
Just the simple forward of an email or media contact or an encouraging word via Twitter is really all it takes, so I try my best to say thank you to them because it’s important to me. I want them to know that they’ve gone above and beyond what others have done. Even a newbie in the industry like Mattie-Lou Chandler has thrown some advice my way. Saying thank you has always been important to me and writing handwritten thank you cards (branded ones of course!) is something I value and pride myself on.
It’s weird, but I do the same thing with guys I date. If a guy does something even remotely nice (which in most people’s world is something simple like kissing your forehead or opening a door), I make a point to say “that was sweet.” It might sound cheesy, but I’m not used to guys doing nice things for me, so I want to make a point to show how much I do appreciate it.
Anyways, back to the actual life coaching part – when I told Sally that was something I liked about myself, I quickly dismissed it, as if it was stupid. How is saying “thank you” something you value or like about yourself? Of course she told me that I judge myself too harshly and that gratitude and thankfulness is something that helps our psyche and well-being and I shouldn’t dismiss it. Until this conversation I hadn’t realized that gratitude is a value.
The definition of gratitude is: the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.
The top two definitions of value are:
the regard that something is held to deserve; the importance, worth, or usefulness of something.
a person’s principles or standards of behavior; one’s judgment of what is important in life.
At the end of our session, Sally challenged me by asking where am I satisfied in my life and dissatisfied. Again, those are things I don’t know the answers to, but I’ve got to mull them over and figure it out. I know I wish I was a wealthy freelancer (do those even exist) and that my memoir was published and that I was in a healthy and loving relationship with a hot man…does that count for anything?
What do you value or like about yourself? I’d love to hear them, especially if they are even small things that you might dismiss.
One of the recurring points I’ve had in my conversations with Sally is that there are things I know I want in my life and attributes I want others to associate with me, but how do you get there? What things do you add to your life or what do you take away to be the ultimate best version of yourself? That’s what I’m here to figure out. Check out Sally’s life coaching website here and stay tuned for the rest of our sessions over the next two months. Clearly I have a lot more to work on, but don’t we all?
The Blondes: Braidee and Jayme at the Houston Symphony Summer Series
I have officially lived in Houston for nine years now. Man, time flies when you’re having fun (I totally should use another word here, but I’ll leave it as is).
One of the most touted things about Houston is how much the city has to offer, but until the other night, I somehow ignored a huge piece of H-town culture – the symphony.
My friend Braidee (pictured on the left) and I went to the Houston Symphony Summer Series at Jones Hall in downtown to see the Music of Michael Jackson, and WOW. I literally can’t remember the last time I had that much time.
The really bummer part was that as I was tweeting and sharing pictures and video clips from the night, everyone wanted to go. They didn’t know about the goodness that existed just a few miles from them either!
This particular show (info below) was only a one-night show, but the Summer Series also includes a Pokemon night, a Back to the Future – Film with Live Orchestra, and other great events that everyone would love, and it’s something outside the norm and just a unique experience.
A few facts & tips for your first (or next) adventure to the Houston Symphony:
– Dress however you like. Obviously we wore little black dresses (as pictured), but we saw people decked out in all varieties, even some dressed in MJ attire. (Ok, I lied, only one person dressed like MJ and she was seven…)
– There is a bar there, but you can’t bring drinks into the theatre (unless you purchase a sippy cup for $3) and the lines during intermission are SUPER long.
– Parking isn’t too bad as downtown really does accommodate, but if you live close, snag an Uber like we did.
– Check out all that downtown has to offer before and after the show – bars, restaurants, etc. Downtown truly has stepped up their game and it’s worth a night out on the town.
– Have fun. I don’t know about normal symphony shows, but the Summer Series was really interactive and laughing, clapping, dancing, etc. was all encouraged and made the night even more enjoyable.
The Music of Michael Jackson event info (from the Houston Symphony website):
Brent Havens, conductor, James Delisco, vocalist/dancer
From Motown to his mega success as a global figure in pop culture, Michael Jackson made HIStory(1995 Platinum album) for his iconic dance moves, over-the-top performances, and of course, his music. The Houston Symphony brings you the Music of Michael Jackson, a high-energy spectacle with the orchestra and amplified with a full band and vocals. This one-night only performance features blockbuster hits like “Thriller,” “Black or White” and “Rock With You,” along with a nod to his Jackson 5 days, including “A-B-C” and “I’ll Be There.” Capturing M.J.’s utter brilliance is singer-dancer James Delisco. Rolling Stone declared M.J. “the world’s greatest entertainer.” Come hear why as we celebrate his phenomenal legacy this summer at Jones Hall.
https://theblondeside.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/IMG_7106.jpg24482448Jaymehttps://theblondeside.com//wp-content/uploads/2018/06/1526998321020-300x192.pngJayme2015-07-25 17:39:022015-08-17 17:50:48The Music of Michael Jackson: Houston Symphony
I am a stressed out individual, but odds are we probably have that in common. We are multi-taskers, go-getters, hustlers and our brains have literally become human computers we never turn off.
Last month I interviewed Houston Texan Duane Brown and his wife Devi. The interview was about their home (see the story here) and I expected to learn about the exotic interior decorator they used and stuff like that, but I was pleasantly surprised to learn about their morning rituals of meditating together.
Meditation has always way too spiritual for me (not to be confused with religious) and a concept I couldn’t grasp, never being able to quiet my mind long enough to reap the benefits of said quiet time.
Devi and Duane got the wheels about meditation and the benefits turning in my head and then Christy Curtis, a yoga teacher based out of Orange County hosted a class at Wanderlust Aspen-Snowmass: Meditation for the Athletic Minded: Be in the Z.O.N.E.. It’s no secret she had me at the word Athletic, so I added her class to my already busy list of yoga/running/hiking/breathing classes.
The Browns and Christy certainly aren’t the first to brag about the benefits of meditation, but perhaps it was knowing what their busy lives entailed and they were all athletes (Christy was a college basketball player) that made me relate and want to test it out their theory.
(If you need proof you can’t possibly be a worse meditator than yours truly, below are the notes I took during Christy’s class. Yes, I took notes, while meditating.)
Her first instruction was, “don’t think – just show up.”
She reminded us that our mind is a muscle too – as athletes we spend so much time training and strengthening our biceps and quads for example, our brain/mind should be treated the same.
One of the things Christy said that resonated with me was the practice of welcoming in thoughts during meditation. Sure, meditation is supposed to be a blank space in your head where you focus on breathing and not your overflowing to-do list, but inevitably thoughts start to creep in and then you get mad at yourself. You’re not supposed to be thinking, dammit.You’re supposed to be nothing right now!
Having practiced and perfected for many years, Christy says to welcome those thoughts in and then welcome them back out. Don’t get mad at yourself, just push those thoughts out and start right back up.
At about the exact second I was thinking how horrible I was at the simple task of sitting still and resting my mind, Christy chimed in reminding us to be kind to ourselves when we meditate. “Don’t question if you’re doing it right,” she said.
I asked Christy the hard question – probably the same one most of you who have attempted meditation want to ask as well – how does one start meditating and become good at it? If you’ve already tired (multiple times) and failed, should you keep trying?
Her response: Start where you are – it’s as simple as that. It can be as simple as 10 seconds before you turn your keys to start your car – maybe it’s just three breaths. You start where you are and I think the main thing is remembering it can be anything. It doesn’t have to be lighting a candle and waking up at 4 a.m. It’s before you go into a huge job interview, before you have a difficult conversation with a loved one, before you go hiking on the mountain top or before that race – where your mind is all over the map and all you have to do is come back to the breath,” she says.
She continued to make it sound easy, but easy it was not. That doesn’t mean I’m ready to give up though.
Some apps she recommends: Stop Breathe and Think, Simply Being, Headspace, and Calm.
Since I still think I’m the worst meditator ever, I’m curious who meditates and what you’ve found works or doesn’t for you? Share in the comments below – I’d love to hear it!
https://theblondeside.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/IMG_6083.jpg30004000Jaymehttps://theblondeside.com//wp-content/uploads/2018/06/1526998321020-300x192.pngJayme2015-07-07 15:42:292015-07-07 15:42:48Meditation for Beginners (Hint: You Don’t Suck At It)
